Transition is a Difficult Thing
Being prepared to roll with change is a requirement to a fulfilled life...and it is just plain smart!
We droppped my oldest son at college and as a mom I am facing a redefinition of my role, in another year my youngest son leaves for school...making me an empty nester...it does not seem possible, but I am there. What will that mean to my parenting style, my marraige, my self image and my work?
Here is peek into the experiences of the past week and what I am taking out of them.
I have been on the road for almost a week, delivering my oldest son Michael to college 22 hours away from my home. The beginning of this journey was an emotional one. The first day we were in the car for 15 hours. 15 hours of thinking can bring up a lot of old stuff. Things I wished I had taken more time to enjoy with my kids, things I wished I had taken pictures of, and things that I am joyful that I chose. I felt like the foundation of my world was being shaken.
Will he miss me?
Will he be safe?
Will I ever be a part of his life again?
How do I let him know I love him without smothering him?
Can I let go enough to let him fly?
Can I hold on enough to keep him close to our family?
Change often brings questions that center around fear. I have always enjoyed change and am trying to keep an open mind about it now. In the closing meeting for parents at the orientation there were many Moms struggling. One, clearly in distress, asked the speaker a question...
How do we say good-bye?
I felt compelled to raise my hand and comment...I told her...
We don't have to say good-bye.
We should take this opportunity to tell our children that we are proud of who they are.
That we will always believe in them and their ability to achieve whatever they put their mind to.
I went over week without hearing from my son, after I left Florida Tech...it was a lesson in patience and trust. Intellectually, I know that it means that my husband and I did a good job in nurturing a confident and well-adjusted child. Emotionally, I wondered all of the questions above.
I got a call last night, yes, from Michael.
2 hours later, after hearing all of the cool stuff that he is doing...
I went to bed happy that I gave him his space and content that he chose to share it.